geometricdeathtrap: metallikato: generallegendary: metallikato: jewelstaites: how to give a good handjob bop it pull it twist it harder better faster stronger You pull your left hand in You pull your left hand out You pull your left hand in And you shake it all about! Cha cha real smooth none of you ever touch a penis
heathyr: hoechloin: what do derek and stiles do in bed together? knot a lot, really
sasstiel-sassbutt: arasellle: justheroverthere: I’m the person who knows their Hogwarts house but not their blood type I know mine. it’s pureblood this post just got 209348451 times better okay
that-stupid-tardis-sound: one time i got bored in class so i drank 3 bottles of water and when my teacher asked me what i was doing i told him i was trying to drown myself
alifechasingghosts: sarcastic-butterfly: Roosters don’t even have teeth wtf it’s honestly just because they couldn’t call their company “Cockbite”
megvsshark: trishhyy: when a girl changes her clothes in front of you, she’s either really interested or you’re level 99 friend-zoned Or she hasn’t spotted you in the tree yet.
misandrwitch: Is This A Kink I Have Or Was This Fic just Really Well Written; an existential crisis in three acts
ileolai: i’m fucking hyperventilatin g
deepspacebutts: ohbehavedarling: “If you test me, you will fail .” - Hikaru Sulu a.k.a Hidden Badass Motherfucker Crouching Pilot, Hidden Badass.
hawkeyeagentbarton: demmonz: Reblog this if you want Hawkeye in The Avengers 2, played only by Jeremy Renner and with a better development of his character I wanna see if I’m alone here
wafflability: adambutton: santaruby: who is Gatsby’s least favorite superhero? Deadpool Who’s his favourite? Green Lantern Oh my god
high-functioningginger: And the Righteous Man spoke unto the Prophet Kevin “I present you with keys to our dwelling. Do not betray this trust with merriment and wine.” And the Prophet replied “Fear not, for I have no one to make merry with” And the Righteous Man gazed sorrowfully at him and spake no more. Chuck 8:23
do-not-feed-the-animal: i-am-fangirl-hear-me-squeel: captainamerica-in-middle-earth: tardisinshire: starllex: starllex: why is blood so hard to wash off of your hands? I JUST REALIZED HOW BAD THIS SOUNDS FOR THE RECORD I HAD A NOSE BLEED IM NOT A SERIAL KILLER hydrogen peroxide dissolves blood. just fyi do you think if you gave someone a huge shot of hydrogen peroxide straight...
professor-remus: I’d just like to point out once more that Hannibal hit someone over the head with a metaphor. He killed Tobias with symbolism.
fuckitfireeverything: captviridian: WHEN YOUR FAVORITE CHARACTER DIES AND YOU JUST HOPE THAT THEY’LL COME BACK BUT THEY NEVER DO AND YOU JUST KEEP LYING TO YOURSELF AND TELLING YOURSELF THEY’LL COME BACK